My Testimony

Welcome reader to the Pastor’s Corner! The intent of this blog is for me to speak to all of you and share some of the books I have been reading, theological concepts I have been studying, or just talk. For this inaugural blog post of the Pastor’s Corner, I wanted to share my own testimony.

My walk with Christ has been a shaky one. From an early age, I have felt close to the idea of a “god”, but it was not until Jr. High that I was first introduced to Jesus by my uncle. He described to me the gift of salvation and it was not a concept I understood at the time. He did encourage me to read the Bible and I began reading Scripture as I would any other book, from the beginning. When I counsel new or younger believers, I recommend them to start in the Gospels, primarily in Luke. I do this because of my own experience and the confusion I had early on. I did not understand that the Old Testament focused heavily on the Jews, so I thought I had to perform the sacrifices mentioned in the Pentateuch. Every night before bed, I would put a small piece of bread on a pocket Bible I had because I thought I needed to do daily sacrifices as that was what I read.

In about 7h or 8th grade, I heard about a youth group called Prime Time and eventually went because I enjoyed the Bible and wanted to learn more. Sadly, I did not learn as much as I wanted nor what I wanted, but I was greatly exposed to Jesus and the cross. I was active in this youth group for several years, but when I started high school I was able to go to another youth group called C.H.I.L. I only went one time to C.H.I.L because that was one of the most uncomfortable experiences in my entire life. Growing up, I was not a popular or well-liked person. This youth group proved that, as I learned all the popular people attended and avoided me the entire night. Even when we broke out in small groups, I found myself on the outside of inside jokes and biblical knowledge that I was never taught. It may come across muddy, but I go to great lengths to ensure all necessary knowledge is present when I preach or lead Bible studies. I never want anyone to feel left out when they hear about Jesus Christ. That is a disservice to God.

To this point in my life, which is about sophomore year, I fell away from Christianity and began to explore dating. I was disappointed with the Christianity I was exposed to and wanted no part of it. During this time in my life, I was bullied and became depressed and often pondered suicide. The rest of high school saw me slipping further and further into sin and into depression. After high school, I began dating a girl who took me to church once. I was very uncomfortable and did not go again for several years. Looking back, I can see clearly how God kept pulling me toward Him time and time again. In college I was more focused on video games and computers than God, but He was still here. That is a constant theme in all of this. I never thought God was imaginary or not real, I just refused to serve Him.

I then dated a girl my senior year of college and she took me to church every Sunday, where I played in the worship band. At the time, I was not getting much out of the sermons and Bible teaching I heard, but it was shaking my core ever so slightly. It took about a year, but I finally accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior. One final obstacle stood in my way. This girlfriend ended our relationship. That shook me to my core, but I solidified my trust in Christ in that moment.

Shortly after this event, I met my now wife, Megan, and we began dating in April of 2020. She was extremely patient with me as I navigated God’s will for me and my anxiety. His plan found me quitting my job and enrolling in seminary to become a pastor. I always feel I can do more, and I push myself, and have pushed myself to the breaking point on several occasions leading to mental breakdowns. There is always difficulty with any career, but pastoring is unique in its challenges. In all the difficulties I have encountered, I would do it all again.

My testimony is a decade long journey of me trying to avoid God, but slowly drawing nearer to Him. I did what I could in my youth to abandon God, but I am ever thankful He was and still is patient with me. I do not know where the Lord plans on taking me. The prospect of the unknown is both exciting, but nerve wracking at the same time. All I do know is that whatever He calls me to do, I pray I can bring Him glory and share the Gospel with the world. He has done so much in my life that a few paragraphs cannot even begin to describe my entire testimony or blessings in my life. The fact that I am still alive is perhaps the biggest blessing, beyond my salvation. I do not know who will read this, but dear reader I pray this encourages you to draw near to God. He truly is calling you to Him. Do not be stubborn like I was and avoid Him. My darkest day as a Christian is still brighter than my happiest day before Christ. Early on in my walk, I read 1 Corinthians 9:16 which has part of the verse saying, “for woe is me if I do not preach the Gospel.” Although my understanding was off, that has been my favorite verse (even if it was a little out of context). Later on in the chapter Paul talks about being a partaker in the Gospel, which for us who have accepted Christ all are.

I greatly appreciate you taking time out of your day and reading my ramblings. I pray this has been a blessing to you and that you are encouraged in your walk with God.